At a dinner for Harvard Alumni, attendees were asked to share their accomplishments, including what they had done that they believed to be most significant. Each person stood and listed off extensive academic and professional achievements. But out of the entire crowd and their lofty achievements, only one person received applause. Her name was Debbie. Her accomplishment?
Being a mother of eight children and a grandmother of more.
But somehow the world does not agree with these ambassadors, government officials, educators, professionals, and leaders of massive enterprises that celebrated this mother. Somehow, the world looks down on motherhood! They don’t see it as an accomplishment. They see having a baby as bondage and limiting a woman’s potential. They say that a woman’s time and efforts are better spent elsewhere.
If that is so, then why was Debbie, a mother, the only one who got applause? And why was she being applauded by some of the greatest intellectuals and business leaders of our day - the people you would expect to be pushing for women to go into the workforce and find their “full potential”?
Perhaps it’s because they see firsthand the ever-increasing impact of feminism that is becoming more and more liberal.
Perhaps they know that 74% of women who get abortions do so because they believe having a baby will get in the way of their career and education. Perhaps they themselves did this and now regret the child that is missing from their life.
Perhaps they know that in the last 50 years, the birth rate has fallen by over 45%, and only 1 in every 20 women of childbearing age is having children. Perhaps they are one of the 19 without children, and regret the lost opportunity to raise a family.
Perhaps they know that only 36% of women in the US are married, the number having dropped from 80% in the last 40 years. Perhaps they are one who remained unmarried by choice, and now regret being without the one that makes them whole.
Perhaps they know that of women who are having children, more and more are leaving them at younger and younger ages to go back to work. Perhaps they did this themselves, and regret having missed their children grow up.
Perhaps they were thinking of their own mothers and the tremendous impact she had on them; the difference she made. Perhaps, as I, they were reflecting on their childhood and remembering how she always let someone else have the last piece of pie, claiming she didn’t want it. How she would stay up late, quizzing you for your big test. How she helped you day after day with your math homework and editing your English papers. How she stayed up with you all night when you were sick, and tirelessly brought you crackers and made you drink water. How she loved you with everything she had, and still had love left for others.
Perhaps you, like they, are reflecting on everything your mother had to do and know and be capable of in order to fulfill her role - how she had to be a teacher, therapist, tutor, translator, nurse, nutritionist, negotiator, event planner, dry cleaner, maid, chef, and chauffeur, just to name a few. If she put her skills on a resume they would include research and problem solving, time management, organizational skills, communication, collaboration, dedication, reliability, teaching, supervising, and managing.
But as Debbie, our Harvard-applauded mother of eight, would tell you if she were here, being a mother is more than knowledge and skills. It’s love so intense that you can’t contain or comprehend it. It’s the realization that there is something far more important than you.
And yet, in a study on how feminism decreases childbearing in the United States, the author concluded that according to feminists “the child was seen as being responsible for women's second-class citizenship …[and] to be truly liberated, an American woman could become her best self only by NOT becoming a mother” (emphasis added).
By NOT becoming a mother? Did anyone else feel like someone just punched their mom? What exactly is this “best self” feminists are advocating for? Is it the fame and prestige of academic accomplishments, awards, earning the highest pay, and becoming a world leader? Or is a woman’s “best self” found in guiding and shaping the future to create leaders? In using her academic accomplishments to teach others? In making the world a better place one person at a time?
Being a mother is not a waste! No one puts their education, knowledge, and experience to better use than a mother. Motherhood is not a cop-out.
Motherhood is knowing that you have meaning, importance, and purpose innate to your very existence.
It’s time to recognize motherhood as an option just as viable as any career a woman can have. In doing so, I’m not suggesting that we pull women from the workforce, politics, leadership positions, or anything else. What I am suggesting is that we recognize motherhood as a real accomplishment. We must support motherhood as a meaningful and fulfilling way for a woman to use her time and talents.
It’s time to join those applauding mothers. It’s time to give motherhood back its value.
Being a mother of eight children and a grandmother of more.
But somehow the world does not agree with these ambassadors, government officials, educators, professionals, and leaders of massive enterprises that celebrated this mother. Somehow, the world looks down on motherhood! They don’t see it as an accomplishment. They see having a baby as bondage and limiting a woman’s potential. They say that a woman’s time and efforts are better spent elsewhere.
If that is so, then why was Debbie, a mother, the only one who got applause? And why was she being applauded by some of the greatest intellectuals and business leaders of our day - the people you would expect to be pushing for women to go into the workforce and find their “full potential”?
Perhaps it’s because they see firsthand the ever-increasing impact of feminism that is becoming more and more liberal.
Perhaps they know that 74% of women who get abortions do so because they believe having a baby will get in the way of their career and education. Perhaps they themselves did this and now regret the child that is missing from their life.
Perhaps they know that in the last 50 years, the birth rate has fallen by over 45%, and only 1 in every 20 women of childbearing age is having children. Perhaps they are one of the 19 without children, and regret the lost opportunity to raise a family.
Perhaps they know that only 36% of women in the US are married, the number having dropped from 80% in the last 40 years. Perhaps they are one who remained unmarried by choice, and now regret being without the one that makes them whole.
Perhaps they know that of women who are having children, more and more are leaving them at younger and younger ages to go back to work. Perhaps they did this themselves, and regret having missed their children grow up.
Perhaps they were thinking of their own mothers and the tremendous impact she had on them; the difference she made. Perhaps, as I, they were reflecting on their childhood and remembering how she always let someone else have the last piece of pie, claiming she didn’t want it. How she would stay up late, quizzing you for your big test. How she helped you day after day with your math homework and editing your English papers. How she stayed up with you all night when you were sick, and tirelessly brought you crackers and made you drink water. How she loved you with everything she had, and still had love left for others.
Perhaps you, like they, are reflecting on everything your mother had to do and know and be capable of in order to fulfill her role - how she had to be a teacher, therapist, tutor, translator, nurse, nutritionist, negotiator, event planner, dry cleaner, maid, chef, and chauffeur, just to name a few. If she put her skills on a resume they would include research and problem solving, time management, organizational skills, communication, collaboration, dedication, reliability, teaching, supervising, and managing.
But as Debbie, our Harvard-applauded mother of eight, would tell you if she were here, being a mother is more than knowledge and skills. It’s love so intense that you can’t contain or comprehend it. It’s the realization that there is something far more important than you.
And yet, in a study on how feminism decreases childbearing in the United States, the author concluded that according to feminists “the child was seen as being responsible for women's second-class citizenship …[and] to be truly liberated, an American woman could become her best self only by NOT becoming a mother” (emphasis added).
By NOT becoming a mother? Did anyone else feel like someone just punched their mom? What exactly is this “best self” feminists are advocating for? Is it the fame and prestige of academic accomplishments, awards, earning the highest pay, and becoming a world leader? Or is a woman’s “best self” found in guiding and shaping the future to create leaders? In using her academic accomplishments to teach others? In making the world a better place one person at a time?
Being a mother is not a waste! No one puts their education, knowledge, and experience to better use than a mother. Motherhood is not a cop-out.
Motherhood is knowing that you have meaning, importance, and purpose innate to your very existence.
It’s time to recognize motherhood as an option just as viable as any career a woman can have. In doing so, I’m not suggesting that we pull women from the workforce, politics, leadership positions, or anything else. What I am suggesting is that we recognize motherhood as a real accomplishment. We must support motherhood as a meaningful and fulfilling way for a woman to use her time and talents.
It’s time to join those applauding mothers. It’s time to give motherhood back its value.